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What is Really Dramatic Change?

Our culture seems to place high value on the over the top change, the make over.  In shows like the Biggest Loser and Extreme Makeover: Home Edition the changes in physical appearance or the amazing new home are so obviously different in such wonderful ways…but what about the “smaller changes” that are just as hard?  The man who loses 20 pounds through healthy eating and exercise should be celebrated just as much as the one who lost 200!  The woman who buys her first house has made the same huge strides towards improving her life as the family given a gorgeous new one!  Look at the strides you make in your life and celebrate the heck out of them!  Even if it is choosing a webinar to learn marketing strategies over watching TV one night, it is a huge step in becoming the person you want to be!

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Knock Outs

A friend of mine said something that has stuck with me because it was both so simple and yet so profoundly true.  It went something along these lines (and, I am taking some liberty in its re-phrasing because she might not use some of these words!!!)

“The saying that beauty is only skin deep is a farce.  The more you scratch away at the surface of a person, the more you see their hopes, their dreams, their fears, their regrets, their humanity, the more beautiful they become.  In fact, the deeper you look, the more you realize that everybody is a knock out.”

Did you get that?  EVERYBODY is a knock out!  By opening up and showing your true self, your unique set of values, emotions and experiences, you become ever more beautiful.  Can you take that thought in?  Can you tell yourself that you are deeply and truly a knock out?  If not, then who else will be able to?  Look deep within and see it, write it down, own it.  You are a knock out.

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Quotables

“The greatest discovery of any generation is that human beings can alter their lives by altering the attitudes of their minds.”

Dr. Albert Schweitzer

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When is the “Right Time?”

Here is the one word answer for that one….NOW.  Now is absolutely the right time.  Those pesky bills, responsibilities, fears and “inadequacies” will be there today and will be there two years from now when you feel more “stable.”  How can I really believe this?  It is because of one brutal truth: we have no control.  We cannot say that we will ever be more stable or more ready.  We cannot expect that everything will fall into some magical equilibrium allowing us to finally get started on change.  We cling to the idea that making a decision is a permanent thing, when in reality, nothing is permanent.  We are constantly setting a course and moving towards it, responding to changes in circumstance along the way, but that is only if we actually start out on the path.  To avoid the starting line just because we are unsure of the timing is our best way to avoid striking out in the first place.  We have no control, therefore every time is the right time.  So, make.  change.  now.  Otherwise, you could be waiting around for nothing for quite a long time.

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How Do You Know?

What does an invigorated life actually look like?  How will I know if the path I am on will lead me there?  While your invigorated life might look different than mine, I can only offer you my experience.  Most days I wake up and really cannot wait to start working.  Some days, I even find it hard to stay asleep because of all of the ideas and excitement bouncing around in my head!  I spend the day reading articles, creating workshops, working with clients and speaking with new people about the coaching world.  I also take at least one hour to go on a run, take a yoga class, a bike ride, or a long walk with a friend.  I run errands that I feel like running or sit on the couch to a read a book when I feel like reading.  I get to spend my evenings with my husband or with family and friends, playing outside or eating and chatting.  I love that every aspect of my day contributes to my work in some way, as well as contributing to my personal well being.  And even on those days that I do not want to get out of bed (because yes, I am human too!), I find myself in a much better mood AFTER starting my work day than before!  This is what it is like to live my life fully conscious of the things that are important to me, to do a “job” that is truly inspiring and that comes from my heart.  This is an invigorated life.

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Trivial…..Reality

Some of us love to trivialize what we are going through….both positive and negative.  We love to downplay our experiences, but why?  Are we afraid that we will overwhelm our audience with our sadness?  With our joy?  With our strength?  Are we afraid that our thoughts will be diminished through another’s judgment?  I have clients who will tell me something very personal through tears, following up with, “It’s not really a big deal.”  What?  Of course it is a big deal!  If it is enough for you to have any sort of emotional response, then it is a big deal.  It is your reality.  It frames your looking glass.  So do not ignore your truth in fear of being disregarded…pursue it.

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Quotables

“To live is the rarest thing in the world.  Most people exist, that is all.”

Oscar Wilde

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It’s an Honor

Many of us have a really hard time sharing our dreams, our stories, and our doubts.  We do not want to seem silly or weak.  We do not know that there are countless others out there that share some of our deepest fears and highest  hopes.  What does it take for you to open up?  What can you gain from it?  What do you lose every time you do not open up?  Being a coach, I get to hear many personal stories that have not been shared with others.  Let me tell you:  You honor the person you share with by trusting them with your thoughts and emotions.  So, who would you like to honor?  Is it your partner?  Your best friend?  Know that you are honoring this person by sharing….but more importantly, you are honoring yourself.

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The Single Story

Yes, this is 19 minutes long, but well worth the challenge.  Once finished, ask yourself, what “single stories” are you holding onto?  What would your life be like if you were to just let them go?

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Be Bold, Be Brave

Admitting you want something different for yourself, something that makes you feel more alive, is an act of courage.  Think about it.  There are many people walking, talking, and moving through life, but not really living it.  Stopping and thinking about your needs, not to mention taking action towards having them met, is a big risk.  What if you get let down by others?  What if you let yourself down?  To really know and embrace the changes that need to be made is a big task.  So, be nice to yourself.  Acknowledge the courage you have by asking for something more from life.  And then, go after it.

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